


Hard and Soft, Fast and Slow

by scorpion22



Category: Wynonna Earp (TV)
Genre: Developing Relationship, Drama & Romance, Established Relationship, F/M, Sex, Slow Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-21
Updated: 2018-08-13
Packaged: 2019-01-20 13:49:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,246
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12434166
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scorpion22/pseuds/scorpion22
Summary: Wynonna comes to a huge realization when she sees that pink car all burned up. She loved Doc, but when she finally tell him how will he respond? Can they make it work? Do they even have a chance? Read and find out. I own nothing.





	1. Chapter 1

Wynonna Earp had never been in love, not like that, not like her sister read about in all her romance novels, so when it happened she didn’t even realize it.  
“He’s over 130 years old. He’s too old for you,” Wynonna thought at first, but the more she watched him, the more time she spent with him the more she realized that he was exactly the kind of man she had been looking for; too bad he had been stuck in a well all that time. Doc Holliday, the man she had spent her life hearing about. Her great, great grandfather’s best friend. The scoundrel, the gunman; only now that she knew him, the real man, did she see that those things were both true and a complete lie. He was all that and more.  
“He’s definitely one of the good guys,” Waverly’s words moved through her head her own words always there too both completely true. Doc was rough, in many ways they were a lot alike, but different too. When she was talking to him, for the first time, Wynonna didn’t feel crazy or like she was alone. Doc understood her in a way no one had since her Uncle Curtis, but that was only one of the reasons why she found herself falling for him. Feeling things for this man, who seemed to fill a hole in her that she hadn’t known she’d been looking to fill.  
He wasn’t like anyone she’d ever met, he was more like her, but rougher somehow. Wynonna felt something with him. She felt it the second they met in the bar that night, but in that moment, everything had been different. She hadn’t known who he was. Or believed in who she was. He had helped her more than anyone else in making her believe. At the same time as he was cracking her inner armor. Wynonna would find herself looking at him out of the corner of her eye, when he didn’t know, and it got even worse after that moment. It was the last thing she had been expecting. That kiss. His kiss. It had been so sudden, one minute they had been fighting, the next they were kissing like two people who needed those kisses to keep breathing. Never in her life had she felt such a rush, both of emotion, and lust. When it was over Wynonna felt something else too. That maybe he was the only man she would ever feel that with. They had crashed into each other and the aftermath had been both a disaster and a burst of fireworks.  
“Something in my gut tells me he’s one of the bad boys,” Wynonna’s own words haunted her because they scared her because they meant one thing; that if she was right he could hurt her and if she was wrong she could hurt herself if she stayed away.  
Wynonna had never allowed herself to be weak before. She always played strong. Like she couldn’t be broken and after a while she started to believe that herself. But Doc made her question that for the first time since leaving those insane walls that held her. That is what led her to run, to try to pretend that moment in the woods never happened. She ran from it.  
“You love him, Wynonna,” Wynonna would think sometimes late at night when she could admit that to herself with no need to fear getting hurt. What she didn’t count on was him. She never thought Doc would leave and that it would lead to her losing him in what she thought the worst way possible. If she had known what was going to happen Wynonna wasn’t sure if she still would have run or not. Then he was gone.  
“He might have gotten out, Wynonna,” Dolls had tried to seem like he was helping, but as Wynonna stared at that pink car all burned up she couldn’t bring herself to believe it; there was only one thing that kept repeating in her head.  
“He’s dead,” Wynonna held back the tears that strength she had built up over time helping her for once as she thought of Doc, dead, gone, not coming back.  
“If I hadn’t pushed him away, he’d never have left. He’d still be here, by my side, with me,” Wynonna knew this thought was the truest she would ever have as she walked away from that car knowing this wasn’t the time to cry; later, she could do that later, when she was all alone.  
As the days passed after Dolls told her, Wynonna acted like she wasn’t affected, but deep down she was. More than anyone could see even Waverly. One thought alone kept repeating in her mind. She had never told him how she felt. That she loved him and now she never would because he was dead somewhere that she didn’t even know. She had finally found love, she hadn’t been looking for it, she hadn’t known it until it was too late, and now it was gone. Wynonna hoped it would never come again. Doc would be one of a kind in that way as he had been in so many others. Wynonna loved Doc and he had loved her too. Now, he was dead. A dead man to silently love for the rest of her life or until the revenants finally killed her reuniting them once more. Now all she wanted to do was go back and tell him. Because that’s what she should have done all along.  
“I should have told him…went after him when he went away,” Wynonna thought sometimes, peacemaker in her hand as she sat in the barn with all that remained of him.  
“I love you, Doc,” whispered Wynonna saying it out loud for the first time and it didn’t escape her that she was still where no one could hear her. But what did matter now. He still wasn’t here to hear it and he was the only one that mattered.  
Those thoughts ran through her head in the days after seeing that burning car. Wynonna never let herself cry over him. She wasn’t so sure he would have wanted her to anyway. Wynonna went on living everyday as if he had never existed, she still had revenants to kill, a family to protect, so until she either died or killed all seventy-seven revenants her grief over Doc had to wait. She had to be strong. Wynonna didn’t cry, her thoughts were her grief, and what would crying do? Would it bring Doc back? Would he come walking through the door if she broke down crying? No, because nothing could bring him back. He wasn’t a revenant; once he was dead, he was dead, and it was permanent, forever. And then Dolls kissed her. She hadn’t been expecting it. She hadn’t known how to respond when it happened, she hadn’t really; only one part of her truly had. Her heart. It had hurt when he kissed her because his lips weren’t right. They weren’t Doc’s. It wasn’t fierce or passionate, it didn’t burn her like his kiss had. It was all wrong and all because it was the wrong man kissing her.  
“No!” Wynonna’s heart, body, her mind had been screaming at her when she turned after to see Doc, alive, and he had just seen her kissing Dolls; as happy as she was to see him, Wynonna hadn’t wanted it to be this way.  
Wynonna had felt her heart pounding. Both from the sight of him and what she knew was happening. What was he thinking? She wanted to reach out to him, explain to him, but there never seemed to be time for that. Something always came first.  
“The first one to bring me Wynonna Earp, dead or alive, gets the antidote,” Bobo’s words had set the whole town on her meaning there wasn’t time for her to say anything to Doc, not the way she wanted to; she had to be strong as always, an Earp. Wynonna had to fight her sister, the one she had wanted back for so long, she had to protect and serve, as seemed to be her curse; she could never come first. But despite what he witnessed, Doc was there, right by her side to defeat the evil. Wynonna let the knowledge that he would always be her best friend even during moments like that, he would be by her side to fight the evil, and slowly it sunk down into her heart, her mind the truth she hid before.  
That she loved him; she had to tell him. Slowly, the chaos died, Wynonna wanted to tell him every day, but she never seemed to have the time. It never seemed to be right. Then suddenly they were alone, face to face, in silence. Wynonna wanted the words to just burst from her mouth, but silence was all there seemed to be. The homestead was deadly quiet as they stood there, her in the kitchen as he stood an entire room away. It was like he was waiting, wanting some explanation yet not wanting it all at the same time.  
“If I’d known you didn’t burn up in that car…I never would have kissed him or let him kiss me,” said Wynonna not having the heart to look at him as she said it. But then he didn’t respond. It made her turn just as she heard his footsteps walking away from her. He was leaving; obviously what she said wasn’t good enough. No excuse would ever be good enough and even as she was following him Wynonna knew that. Wynonna didn’t think it was either. She should have fought harder. Dolls lips never should have touched hers. Doc had a right to be angry; she never should have let it happen. That moment flashed in her mind, of that car, and as it did the silence just hung there. Until blinking, Wynonna realized he was walking out the door, and she found herself running to stop him suddenly blinded by tears as she did so.  
“Doc, wait!” exclaimed Wynonna stopping when he rounded on her.  
“For what exactly, Wynonna? For you to tell me how sorry you are and how you just don’t feel that way for me. How you don’t want to hurt me, but that is just how it is. I’ve had many a woman say those words and I don’t want to hear it again,” said Doc his voice just for a second portraying his vulnerability.  
“Doc…” Wynonna started again as he turned to walk away from her again. Wynonna for a second watched him, but then she remembered that time when regret had weighed down her heart. Now was the moment she could fix that, so letting herself be vulnerable with tears in her eyes, she ran after him.  
“Doc!” exclaimed Wynonna grabbing him by the shoulders using them to whirl him around again. She took his face in her hands and like he did in that first moment, she crashed their lips together.  
“I’m sorry…I’m sorry…I missed you. I need you,” gasped Wynonna the tears leaving her eyes to run trails down her face their lips barely touching before she crashed them together again though slower this time. When he noticed the tears, he brought his hand to wipe them away.  
“I almost lost you. I was sure you were dead…dead…I’m sorry about what happened with Dolls, but It won’t…again. I don’t want to think that again…that you’re dead…I almost missed the chance to tell you,” exclaimed Wynonna her tears covering her face in drenches as he continued to wipe them away. Doc had never seen Wynonna cry before and seeing her like this now amazed and scared him at the same time. Her fingers dug into his shirt as she held it in her tight fist using it to keep him with her as well to hold herself up.  
“Tell me what, darlin,” whispered Doc ridding her of her tears as they continued to cover her face. He just couldn’t believe she was standing in front of him, crying. That was something he never thought he’d see.  
“That I love you,” said Wynonna staring straight at him before burying her head in his chest crying still her arms wrapping around him. Doc stood there doing the same after a moment. He had waited too long to hear her say that.


	2. Through the Darkness

Doc’s faced flooded her mind when Wynonna opened her eyes the next morning. She didn’t visually see him, but she remembered that last moment before everything around her seemed to go black. That moment when she had let every barrier down and cried in his arms. When she had admitted the one thing she had never admitted to anyone before. That she loved him and as she remembered those words, Wynonna sighed, part of her scared of what was to come. Those words, that moment when she said them to him, finally, they changed everything. As it flashed before her pained sleep filled eyes, she winced. Dried tears stuck like hardened plaster to her face and her thoughts were filled with equally painful questions. What was going to happen now? Would they be able to move forward after all that had happened? The future was uncertain, Wynonna had always known that even before returning to Purgatory, but now, for the first time, she was afraid of what the future could hold. She didn’t know what to do or how to react. She didn’t know how to be anything then the emotionless, hard stiff lipped woman she pretended to be. The woman that everyone knew, the woman who had let her guard down with Doc, so he could see the other side of that same woman. Wynonna didn’t know how to be both sides of that woman and deep down as she lay there, she couldn’t deny that she was scared to try. Those questions paralyzed her, so much so in that moment that she was lost to everything, but the morning sun as it breezed through her window.   
Wynonna didn’t realize just how scared and uncertain and lost she was in thought until she was abruptly forced out of them. Suddenly, just when she had thought she was alone, in her room, in her bed, a pair of hand then a pair of arms were there with her touching her, cradling her, and raising every inner wall she had. Wynonna felt her inner nerves raise until suddenly she just reacted on instinct. Rolling the intruder to the ground beneath her bed, Wynonna followed him straddling the intruder to pin whoever it was to the ground. She was just about to punch that same person in the face when she realized just who she was attacking.   
“Doc?” exclaimed Wynonna settling down almost immediately when she realized it was him who she straddled his grin settling her nerves even as he raised his hands in surrender to her.   
“I’m sorry” whispered Wynonna closing her eyes as she let her hands run over her face her entire body deflating as her fists fell against his chest softly. Doc lowered his hands as well letting them settle at her waist as she moved to leave him. When Doc made her stay atop him, Wynonna smiled that tiny smile so rarely seen on her face, and unclenching her hands, she laid them against his chest. Helping him sit up, Wynonna snuggled closer, and as he moved her messy hair out of her face she found she felt content. Content in a way she hadn’t felt since returning home.   
“Remind me to never wake you up in the morning” said Doc his voice tender as their eyes met making him frown as he saw the dull almost sad look in her eyes.   
“I—I thought you might be a revenant…I can’t not worry about them even now. I can never let my guard down” whispered Wynonna her voice low almost nonexistent. Doc touched her cheek his touch soft against her skin. He saw a side of her in that moment, a vulnerability he knew she didn’t share easily. He found himself feeling lucky, she was sharing a vital part of herself with him.   
“It’s my job as an Earp to break the curse…I can’t think about anything else—I can’t be weak” whispered Wynonna feeling as he suddenly held her closer his touch all the softer silently telling her that with him, she could be vulnerable and show him the parts she showed to no one else. The scared parts. The parts that she had begun to hide when locked away for all those years.   
Doc knew Wynonna held a lot of pain inside herself, pain that in that moment he wanted to take away, and also a lot of fear. Fear that she had held within herself since the day she accidentally shot her daddy. Doc wanted to help her through that. He wanted to fight this darkness with her just as Juan Carlo said he should and as he looked at her, he knew that was why he was there. Wynonna had never shown that part to anyone and in that moment, she was afraid he’d run, but as he made her look at him something inside her warmed.   
“It’s alright, darlin” said Doc his voice drawing her in close as his touch became all the gentler their faces getting all the closer his arms suddenly around her completely.   
“Doc?” said Wynonna her voice softer this time as her body leaned as close as it could into his embrace his breath against her neck letting her know he was there, to protect her from everything especially the revenants.   
“Wynonna, you don’t have to hide nothing from me. You can let it go with me—be Wynonna…without worrying about being an Earp” whispered Doc the look in his eyes alone telling her that he was completely and utterly sincere.   
“I can’t just stop being an Earp overnight…it’s become part of me, you know. I don’t know if I know how to stop” said Wynonna her voice small as her eyes peered into his. She knew that he was the only one she could tell. He was the only one who understood, who could even attempt to. In fact, as she looked at him, Wynonna knew that that was one of the reasons she loved him because unlike everyone else around her, he was her equal in every way.   
“But—for you, I can try to be less of an Earp, and more of a human being” whispered Wynonna leaning closer to him smiling as his touch made her tingle their lips meeting suddenly yet slowly as they fell into each other. Wynonna felt as his hands touched her, one touching the back of her neck tightly gripping small strands of her hair as the other held her tighter somehow gripping one of her hips. It was like he was possessing her in a way Wynonna had never allowed before yet also cherishing her in a way she had always wanted.   
When she broke away from him, Doc let her hold his face in her hands, and looking into her eyes he saw immediately that she was laying herself completely bare to him.   
“I can’t promise to be perfect or easy—but I can promise to try…this…with you. Because I don’t want to lose you, Doc, because I love you…I really do” whispered Wynonna her voice cracking as her words ended. She found she needed to, wanted to. Wynonna had never told anyone other then her sister that she loved them. She always held everything so close to the vest, but here she was. Telling the man, she loved that she loved him for the second time. Doing it because she had to, wanted to, needed to simply because she did love him, and couldn’t risk losing him again. The words seemed to tug them closer together as his lips nipped at hers in response.   
“Wynonna—darlin…I love you” said Doc his lips still against hers before he claimed them enveloping her in his arms. That kiss more then anything else said how true both their words were. Both feeling suddenly whole, complete, like they had finally found what they’d been looking for.   
“I love you” gasped Wynonna falling deeper into his arms as her back hit the floor her arms clutching him drawing his body down towards her as it covered hers. Doc didn’t let his lips stay on hers. He didn’t disappoint her though, for though his lips left hers they immediately began to travel over her his presence never leaving her. They moved over her, tickling her, lingering over soft skin. First her neck, then her collarbone his grin against her skin as she moaned in response to his touch as he went lower still. As he moved, Wynonna noticed that his arms never left their place around her, his hands never left their place at the small of her back almost seeming to protect her still even in that intimate moment.   
Tracing her collarbone then the cleavage peaking through her shirt, Wynonna felt like she was being worshipped. For the first time it didn’t feel like she was being used as some cheap piece of ass. Wynonna felt loved for the first time in this most intimate way. It scared her even as it warmed her. No one had ever touched her like he was in that moment. Or kissed her like way he did. Doc was slow, peaceful, tender even, and in that moment as he loved her, it was not lost on her. Where others groped her, fucked her like the local whore, Doc wasn’t doing that. In that moment, he was making love to her, and Wynonna knew that.   
When his lips returned to hers that tender touch was still there.   
“Doc” gasped Wynonna kissing him right back her touch just as soft as his as her hands went up his shirt to touch the skin of his back before returning to his face feeling as he leaned in close seeking out her touch before their eyes met.   
“Please, Doc…I need you” whispered Wynonna her fingers tangling in his hair tugging him closer until sharing a breath their lips met again then again in a chorus of emotion that almost overwhelmed them. That only lasted a moment before suddenly drawing apart, they peered at each other through heavy lidded eyes both their breathing heavy. Both were a little scared of what was happening now, but they didn’t want to stop it. They wanted it to come quicker, to overwhelmed them completely. That’s why their lips met again this time far more frenzied. When they parted next, Wynonna felt her heartbeat as it dropped as their bodies parted altogether.   
“Doc?” said Wynonna feeling confused, rejected, and so many other things until he pulled her up from the ground to her feet.   
All that went away yet stayed with her at the same time until suddenly Wynonna found him kissing her again. His lips descended upon hers and claimed her completely. Wynonna loved it then hated it then loved it again as her arms moved around him. They hung around his neck as her body collided with the bed her knees buckling as she fell onto it bringing him with her. Doc didn’t let her go though, he held her closer almost burying her in his arms. His kiss remained that way until breaking away for air, Doc seemed to peer down at her a special unknown look in his eyes. His hands came to cradle her face and Wynonna didn’t know what to expect from him. He was always surprising her and she knew as their eyes peered up at each other that now would be no different. There was something he wanted to say, she could see that, sense it. There was a heavy emotion that she knew she was lucky to be seeing. She knew that together they could be vulnerable, together, no secrets, no lies. Wynonna found herself embracing that just as she was embracing her love for him.   
“I love you, Wynonna—I have since the moment I set eyes on you. I’m not running away again…I’ll face the darkness with you—I’ll face anything with you” whispered Doc his words seeming to hypnotize her. She had never dreamed she’d hear anything like that from anyone but looking at him Wynonna smiled. She didn’t want those words to come from anyone else, only him, because she loved him madly.   
“We’ll face it together” said Wynonna in response the future not so scary anymore making him smile as his hands came to grip her hips as if to make sure she couldn’t go anywhere.   
Finding the hem of her shirt, Wynonna let him lift it over her head their eyes locked as he drew her close once it hit the floor. Hiding his face in her neck, their arms went around each other as they seemed to fall in slow motion onto the bed. To Wynonna and Doc, something changed in that moment. It was like they found a lost piece they both had been missing. Like somehow now they were made whole.


End file.
